I have a little bit of a sore throat. Just in case it’s a cold and not allergies, I decided to gargle with salt. But then I thought, “is there a way to direct this salt water directly to my tonsils?”

Then I got an idea. “I bet I could POWER WASH MY TONSILS WITH MY WATER PIC & SALT WATER!” 
Proud of my ingenuity, I filled my water pic with warm salt water, put the pic in my mouth and aimed for my tonsils. 

I then turned on the water. 

The feeling, when a pin-point high velocity jet of water hits the most sensitive part of your mouth is really difficult to describe. 

I mean…I MEAN, I write commercial scripts as part of my very PROFESSION, yet the feeling of a pressurized jet of saltwater hitting the back of your throat is nearly indescribable. 

I can only call the sensation, “serious stupid.”

After “serious stupid” careened off of the back of my very spinal cord buried deep behind the soft tissue and bone of my spine, it washed my tonsils in saltwater and slid down my throat, triumphant it having drawn first blood. 

Ladies and gentlemen, take my word for it: gargling is perfectly fine. No need to reinvent the wheel. 
You’re welcome.